Television, you magnificent bastard.

Well, you may or may not remember my post about the American version of Kitchen Nightmares which then turned into a rant about the glaring differences not only in the shows, but in the general audiences as well. (I don't remember, and I'm too lazy to read the blog in question, but I'll play along...) Last night was a good night for American television, at least on the channels I watched, and I just wanted to recognize it.

The Office was on, back for its latest season. I didn't watch the whole thing because I was flipping between that, the Red Sox game (Tampa Bay is going DOWN baby!) and FOX's Kitchen Nightmares. I'll start with Kitchen because it was a total 180 from just about all previous episodes. Didn't see the beginning, but it seemed like it was not a family owned business for once. A good start.

Back to the Sox game- Jon Lester is in the midst of a no hitter into the 5th inning (Yeah, thanks for that jinxing phone call Dame!!) looking sharp! Jon Lester is actually a blog topic for another day, him being a cancer survivor, dominant Southpaw, World Series Champion, owner of a No Hitter, (only 1?) etc, etc...Over to the Office..

I don't know why Michael Scott was wearing a goatee at times, I don't know why there was a contest to lose weight, and I don't know why they let coke addicted Ryan back into the fold, but it didn't matter it was still funny as Hell! I hate the character of Andy, but I felt bad for him. His fiance Angela (don't ask) pages her former lover, the ever hilarious Dwight, right in front of him so that she and Dwight can go have strange, adultrous, monkey sex in the warehouse. (Monkey sex?!?....oh yeah...Dwight calls her Monkey...) Back to Kitchen Nightmares...

Gordon is having a tough time dealing with one of three unnecessary manangers in a place called the Black Pearl in New York City. (Oh please don't go on about the city again....) Despite the fact that I loathe that disgusting, (damnit....) scum infested, filth ridden, Location filled with self absorbed, mindless insults to the rest of American people, (wow...) I watch anyway. Can't really get around it, since every episode since season one has involved a restaurant in or around the Pit. (Isn't this season 2?) Anyway, the manager scum Gordon was dealing with this week had the balls to sell "authentic Maine Lobster Rolls." (What's wrong with that?) The problem there is that Gordon took one look at the stash of Lobsters in the back and correctly pronounced them Canadian Lobsters. When questioned about the authenticity of his "Maine Lobsters" the Jackass manager simply said, "North American waters...same thing." Gordon apallingly asks again whether or not Canadian is the same as Maine to this Screwhead, and the guy says, "Are they not the same animal?" This guy isn't just asking this question, he's responding in the most condescending, asshole way anyone could possibly position themselves. Gordon eventually gives up and moves on. So do I...back to the Sox

My buddy Damien had called me while Lester was in the midst of his outing last night in the 5th inning to make me aware of the fact that he was pitching a no hitter. (Didn't I already mention that?) That's a Cardinal sin!! You don't mention anything about a no hitter until after it's happened!!! Dame and I are Hardcore Sox fans, and were just talking earlier over beers about how Goddamn closely we followed the 03 and 04 seasons while we were roommates at the time. I kept a big schedule on the wall each year, and recorded wins and losses with Ws and Ls, tallying up monthy records, and even charting other cool stuff happening around the league, like Randy Johnson throwing a Perfect Game in 04, multiple game hit streaks, and David Ortiz singing a contract extension. (Nerds...) When I flipped back to last night's game, I saw that the score was now 6-1, implying that not only was the no hitter gone, but so was the shut out. Oh well. Lester already pitched a no hitter earlier this year, and the reality of him pitching a second one was going to be very difficult to realize. Still winning though, that's the important thing...back to the Office.

(HOLD IT!! I can't take much more of this dizzying ride....) Well, that's how my tv watching went last night. Surprisingly, I was able to watch (mostly) 3 great bits of programming. What made things fun, was when Janelle, my beautiful fiance, came home from work around 9:45pm. By now, most everything I was watching was almost over. Her and I stayed on the 3 channel flip carousel until 10pm when everything but the game was over. We watched the end of the game, and then we flipped through until we found a sweet infomercial for Rock Ballads. We sang along with the samples and laughed out loud at the fact that between the two of us, we pretty much knew all the words to them all! A perfect end to a day. (Hey, you didn't use any pictures this time? And no songs to reference? You're losin it, dude.)